Taking In Everything We Inherit From Our Parents
August 31st, 2016

"I became aware of the Fateful links between me and my ancestors. I feel very strongly that I am under the influence of things or questions which were left incomplete and unanswered by my parents and grand-parents and more distant ancestors. It often seems as if there was an impersonal karma within a family, which is passed on from parents to children. It has always seemed to me that I had to answer questions which Fate had posed to my fore-fathers, and which had not yet been answered, or as if I had to complete, or perhaps continue, things which previous ages had left unfinished."  -Carl Jung, from Memories, Dreams, Reflections "... So too we are dwarfs astride the shoulders of giants. We master their wisdom and move beyond it. Due to their wisdom we grow wise and are able to say all that we say, but not because we are greater than they."  -Isaiah di Triani (c. 1180 - c. 1250) In your inner image of your place in your family lineage, do  Read more...

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Adoption and Family Constellations
July 27th, 2016

A constellation on adoption can provide insight, understanding and relief for the unresolved energies that may cling to the souls of the birth parents, adopting parents and adoptee.  Although the circumstances which gave rise to the adoption happened long ago (and possibly a number of generations back in the ancestral lineage), they have lingering effects.  There are many questions that remain to be lived through for all family members who are involved.  An adoptee may want to know what kind of people their parents were, and what qualities and skills they may have inherited from them.  They may also wonder about the reasons for the adoption, and retain challenges of feeling good enough in some situations.  These questions do not easily reveal their gifts through the logic of language or the assessments of morality, but may be approached slowly and carefully, in the right timing, with the guidance and support of a constellation facilitator. There are  Read more...

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Why did Kunta Kinte refuse to have his name changed?
May 31st, 2016

In our workshops Kelly and I usually begin with a round of introductions, using a particular format that was shown us by our teachers, Peter and Jamy Faust.  It goes like this: “I am Charles Albert Cogliandro; I am the son of Augustino Bruno Cogliandro, and I am the son of Dorothy Ann Dippert Cogliandro.”  We model this by going first, taking our time, and internally presencing our father and mother as we say their names.  We let ourselves feel how we are not only telling the group who we are as individuals, but at the same time representing our parents in the group in their absence.  We are the flesh and blood, living embodiments of our parents.  It also reminds us that as we were given our names by our parents, they were each named by their parents as well.  Over the years of performing this short ritual, I have come to feel dedicated to presenting them well. After everyone in the group has introduced themselves this way, I usually  Read more...

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The Overlapping Fields of Consciousness in a Constellation
April 1st, 2016

I share the following thoughts at the close of each of my drumming groups:  We are all part of something much greater than ourselves; we are all connected to each other and to everything there is through the invisible threads of a great web; and our thoughts, words and actions resonate the filaments of the web and affect, in subtle ways we may not understand, the great universal field of consciousness.

There are many ways I’ve been influenced by the West African drumming music I have studied for almost 25 years.  One of the primary skills I’ve developed is the ability to hear the multiple simultaneous rhythms played by the djembe and dunun drums in a piece of music, and how they create the rich orchestration of the whole.  This ability has proven valuable in the facilitation of constellation healing work.  When a person sets up a constellation, they are invoking and engaging with various levels of consciousness simultaneously.  As the  Read more...

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How Constellations and Therapy Differ
February 29th, 2016

There is tremendous, life-changing possibility in Family Constellations healing.  Some people have asked us how it differs from psychotherapy.  There are numerous differences, but I want to share one of the primary ways a constellation uniquely offers healing.

In psychotherapy the focus is mainly on a person’s behaviors, thoughts, moods and feelings and what new skills and resources can be developed by that person to create positive change.  Through many different possible approaches, a therapist supports the client to work through or solve a problem and create more well-being and personal satisfaction, whether that be in relationships, career, spirituality, or health.  This will likely involve examining the individual’s strengths and weaknesses in various areas, and helping that person cultivate different habits and outlooks to cope with challenges in new ways. From the outset, the Family Constellations method holds the individual  Read more...

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